


your obedient servant

by ArtemisD



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Canonical Character Death, Character Death, Episode 102 Spoilers, F/M, Other, Spoilers, Spoilers for Episode 102, it's mostly Vax and RQ
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-24
Updated: 2017-06-24
Packaged: 2018-11-18 06:23:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,226
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11285502
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ArtemisD/pseuds/ArtemisD
Summary: -MAJOR SPOILERS FOR EPISODE 102-Vax'ildan has a talk with his Queen after the events of 102.





	your obedient servant

When Vax wakes up, he is not staring up at a snowy sky with Vecna and Delilah Briarwood in his peripheral. His fingers twitch, and hands clench quickly. Eyes dart open, and instead he sees nothing but pure darkness. No evil archlich, no female necromancer, no knight clad in blackness, and no Vox Machina. He finds he is no longer paralysed on the ground, but instead vaguely floating in an ether of nothingness. Vax sits up, quickly scours the surroundings for any member of his family - they are missing from his view; instead, he sees a small porcelain face in front of him.

"My champion... you have fought well for me." The Raven Queen's soft timbre echoes in Vax's mind, and his eyes go wide, and soften after a brief moment.

"I died, my queen," he pauses, "did they kill Vecna? Is Delilah dead? Are my family okay?" His questions come rapidly as he briefly panics, focused on his family.

"The woman is dead, and your family are alive for now. The Whispered One is growing stronger." Her soft tones do little to ease his panic - they did not defeat Vecna. Are they still fighting? Did they escape? Is anyone else dead? Vax takes a long, deep breath.

"I have failed you, my queen." He looks down at his knees with minute revelry. A porcelain hand lifts his chin up with one finger, directing his gaze towards her.

"There are many missions yet to take place, Vax'ildan. Your thread is tightly wound by your family, even in death." Vax now notices the hand beneath his face has a tiny, ethereal thread attached, leading from his heart into the darkness. There are many other threads, just as ethereal and bright, joining with his before disappearing from his view. He stares at the connection for a moment, before his queen speaks again in the same soft voice he has come to trust.

"My champion," her hand strokes the side of his cheek, "I will give you a choice. I may lead you to the other side, and a new champion chosen from your realm." Before she can finish her statement, stray tears begin to fall down Vax's cheeks, connecting with the porcelain hand.

"I don't want to die. I want to finish our mission. I want to see my family, and I want to finish Vecna once and for all, with my family and with you by my side. Vex - I bargained with you to bring my sister back, and she bargained with you to bring me back, and Keyleth did too. My entire relationship with you, my queen, has been bargaining for life back. And as much as I want to be alive, and I want to see my family again, hug my sister, kiss Keyleth, joke with Grog and Scanlan, talk with Pike about you and Sarenrae and be a brother to Percy and Tary - I don't want to bargain with you anymore. Your will be done. If it is your will that I died today, then that is how it will be, and I will accept it." Vax's tears subside for but a moment, resolving himself for his queens response. He looks at his hands resting on his knees.

Vax thinks back to the last interactions he had with his family. Sneaking through the Shadowfell. Riding on the back of a Gloomstalker with Scanlan - Scanlan, who only recently returned to their family. Vax wishes he had more time to give him a big hug and a kiss on the head, to hear more about his year in Ank'Harel. He missed him so much.

He wishes he could have seen Vex and Percy get married, have children, long after Vecna was gone. He thinks about how he'll never meet his future nieces and nephews - never ruffle Trinket's fur again. More tears follow when he thinks about Vex. His twinnie. He just wants to hug her one last time.

He thinks about Grog and Pike. He hopes they will find happiness somewhere. He remembers joking with Grog, the big hug he received in Vasselheim after Grog's drunken Moonhammer antics, his echoey voice saying "I love you too" last time he fell. He never did get to use Tary's gift on him.

Pike, their angel in disguise. Monstah. Her presence lit up the room every time she came back. He thinks about how he won't be able to talk to her again, drink again, laugh again. He looked up to her so much. He hopes Sarenrae will watch over her always. He silently hopes the Raven Queen will too.

Taryon Darrington, their newest family member. He lets out a small, sad chuckle when he remembers the hazing they gave him. He remembers the panic they felt when he went missing. He thinks about the silly fight song Tary made up. He hopes his brigade does well. He hopes Tary is the hero he wanted to be.

Vax thinks about Allura. Kima. Kashaw. Zahra. Kaylie. Gilmore. All of the friends they've made along the way. Especially Gilmore. Vax still has some love for the man after all this time. He wishes he could have seen him again. One last conversation. One last hug. One last flirty comment. One last trip to Emon.

He thinks about Keyleth. His beautiful Keyleth. He lets out a sob when he thinks about her. She'll be alive so much longer than the rest of them. He wanted to see her lead her people. He wanted to get married. He wanted to be by her side for as long as he could be. Vax wishes he could kiss her again. Just once more. To listen to her voice. Hold her hand. He'll miss her and Vex the most.

As his quiet sobs echo in the darkness, the memories of his family flying through this head, he fails to notice the porcelain face of the Raven Queen move closer. Her hands cup both of his cheek as he cries, arms wrapped around himself. The mask fades for only a moment, as the woman behind the mask appears. She strokes his tears away.

"Come, my champion." She retreats from his body, but offers a hand to him. Vax wipes away his tears quickly, and quietly stands up in the void. He stands up straight, and looks her in the eye. He takes a heavy breath, and nods at her.

"My queen." He takes her offered hand. The face of the Raven Queen leans forward and slowly plants a kiss onto his forehead.

The air is sucked out of his lungs. His vision goes black. His queen's hand disappears from his grip, he cannot feel her touch on his head. He cannot feel anything around him except cold as he struggles to catch his breath, oxygen escaping him. He closes his eyes and stops resisting the pulling force on his body. The thought that rushes through his head is one of resolution - this is the end of Vax'ildan. I love you, Vox Machina.

"Vax?"

His eyes shoot open, the air is forced into his lungs, his body jumps and clenches all at once as he hears a familiar voice. His head thrashes as he regains feeling. He adjusts to the brightness blocking his vision, and can see a familiar face leaning over his. Several familiar faces.

He sobs.

**Author's Note:**

> I really just like angst you guys  
> Also Matt you sadistic shit for ending the episode right as Vex asked "where's Vax" ;-; amazing moment to end it on but wow stab me in the heart  
> AKA I loved the episode but I think Keyleth using True Resurrection without talking to the Raven Queen first might be a bad idea. RQ may have her own feelings about letting her champion return again. If VM went to the RQ Temple, tried to speak to the queen and THEN cast True Res, I would be much happier - and even happier if the ritual worked and we got a conversation between Vax and his deity about life and death.


End file.
